Sorry...

I really want to apologise to you bec...
well i feel sorry for being so angry at everything that is happening to me
it just feels like everything is collapsing on me at once and i feel like a small speck....
after reading what you wrote and actually had tears
well it's not your fault or ellie
it's just fate that you guys have to leave...
as i'm the only child in the family
i just wanted someone to be there for me when eveyrthing goes wrong
to share secrets and tell them what's making me down
i just feel like i don't have anyone beside me
mum and dad are not the right person to talk to
i have no close friends in malaysia that i can really talk to since we haven't seene ach other for ages
my cousin who was the only person that was so close to me when i was little seldom communicate now since he has his own life to deal with
and now at school i just have friends that say hi and bye and talk about school work
i just feel like i have to talk to myself and find an answer out of myself
everytime i have a problem i have no where to look too but myself and the walls around me
I just feel lonely
I want someone to talk to
to tell everything that i have
so they can help me with my problems.....
sometimes my phone is just devoted to you and ellie
my inbox is just you and ellie
and everytime my phone is on is just because of you and ellie or mum and dad
i wait for txt messages
i wait for e-mails
i wait for replies
i wait....
I sometimes feel like i'm waiting for something for my whole life
a friend?
everyone i know in malaysia are having such good social life that i'm so jealouse
thanks for everything bec even though sometimes i get so angry and frustrated with you
i love you so much
i just can't bear seeing that i'm alone with no one to talk to
and you....
moving to a new environment can make so close friends so easily
I sometimes think myself as a failure in socialising but sometimes i think i'm so good at it
because I am friends with you and ellie
and I love it!
Thanks guys.......

BY Peanut